the frustrated journalist often same Wednesday, December 1, 1976 THE REVIEW The Perils Of The Peninsula Penman ...A Guest Opinion By KEITH NORBURY The trouble with being a free-lance journalist in Sidney issomething like being a logger stranded in Death Valley, or a deep see fisherman confined to the waters of the legislature fountain, One can be bursting at the temples with unfettered talent, but with no raw materials nearby upon which to practice his art the artist will remain obscure and ridiculous forever. Likewise, the fisherman is rduced to performing feats usually reserved for the now- extinct Doukhobour goldfish swallowers. And so it is with the peninsula writer, who must content himself with reporting and recording the banal and mundane events in the lives of his townsfolk. Obviously tea parties, rowing races, council meetings, dogfish, eccentric birds, silver threads news, the Saanichton Fair and All Sidney Days do .not provide the reporter with very dynamic copy. In such circumstances produces a colourful and highly overblown version of the facts. Case’ in point: the recent Review article entitled ‘*Sidney Fisherman Jousts With Death In’ Fog Shrouded Straits’’ wherein author John Manning unreels a yarn of Herman Melvilliam proportions. Unfortunately, the sinking of the ‘New Hope’’ compares to the Titanic disaster something like a squandering baby’s bathtub* toy relates to a punctured dinghy drowning in the depths of Deep . Cove (another curse of the local writers appears to be _ their obsession with alliteration). Naturally, articles written about such subjects lose the powerful and fundamental writing effect of un- ’ derstatement. The reason being that it is akin to im- possible for the local writer. to draw analogies between such - plain topics, as the ones at his disposal, trivial. less the and anything One encounters problems when _ at- lempting to understate the qualities of an anthill, even- iually and invariably (although: perhaps only as ‘the ‘result of advanced frustration) one ends up describing a mountain. ob + Grn ae ae See oe Peninsula Players present George Garrett’s SIR SLOB & THE PRINCESS at Sidney Elementary School FRIDAY, DEC. 3 AT 8:00 P.M. SATURDAY, DEC. 4 AT 2:00 P.M. & 8:00 P.M. Adults $1.00 “newsprint revenue, the-ecstatic aS Such is the plight of the peninsula penman, his writing repertoire, with the possible exceptions of Horth Hill, Cloak Hill and Mount Newton (and they’re not the Himalayas) is restricted to the anthills of his friends, his neighbours and his com- munity. It is sad because these same entities are often the stock which embody the classics of the great journalists. What else is there to be said? The events which support the news on the Saanich Peninsula contain little or no Pulitzer prize-winning potential. Consequently, the local writer is deprived of a tangible goal upon which to focus his sights. FEW MURDERS There simply are not enough syndicate murders, volcanic eruptions, meteor showers, invasions from outer space, corrupt politicians, exorcisms, thermonuclear explosions, swim-suits optional beaches, radical terrorists, stampedes, anarchists, shark attacks, regal coronations, satanic cults, Led Zeppelin concerts, train robberies, massage parlours, motion picture studios, prison riots, topless reataurants or locust plagues happening in the area to provide a balanced diet for the undernourished peninsula writer. The people of the peninsula just are not making new. Sure, one can blame the peninsula’s small population and_ rustic atmosphere for failing to induce in its citizens a sense of responsibility for producing newsworthy events. Still, itisa shallow — excuse, especially when one considers the case of the California community of Santa Cruz, with a population of less than thirty thousand (no more than live within the area of the Review’s circulation) where between October 1970 and April 1973 there occured’ no less than 31 brutal murders, 26 of them committed by the hands of only three psychotic mass-murderers. Imagine the frightened townspeople; imagine the mystified detectives, the overworked, understaffed police, the increased bulk journalists suddenly provided with enough good copy to quench their creative zests for A 1S om 1.7 aad + Children $,50 Over the years there have been many im- provements in Funeral service and it is wise to choose McCall's. For dignified service, up-to- date facilities and long experience. One-level convenience, air-conditioned, ample convenient parking. MC CAL L BROS FUNERAL CHAPELS 1400 Vancouver St. atJohnson 385-4465 buffalo‘ years. Imagine the soaring advertising rates, the 72 point face headlines, the yellow journalism. Is there no justice? Why should one newspaper hotbed be left totally deprived ol disasters? The answer to these questions (and others) is that there is no reason. And it can be supposed that most readers will probably shrug their shoulders, raise their eyebrows and say -‘‘who cares?’ It’s quite fine for the reader to be satisfied with such slumber inducing news, he only has to read the garbage; but just try for a moment to take the vantage point of the artist (if you can’t, he is better off being published on the back of cereal boxes). No doubt you'll find yourself sweating brine droplets as big as Christmas tree lights, emersed in the desperate task of pitting John Newman against Jinmy Carter for front page space. Where are the scandals, the contradictions in philosphies, the exaggerated facial ex- pressions?) Once the initial SHOULD TEACHERS BELONG TO EMERGENCY ORGANIZATIONS? Should teachers who belong to volunteer organizations respond to a call of duty when there is an emergency? That was the question debated at Saanich school board meeting last week in response to a letter from a district teacher who is a volunteer with the Provincial Emergency Program. The teacher, who was not identified because trustees did not want to make it a ‘‘per- sonal thing,’’ asked the board if he could attend calls oc- curring during working hours, and how would a substitute be paid in his absence. “I fear we are setting a precedent,’? Trustee Norma Sealey said, “if classrooms have to be depleted in an emergency.”’ The emergency program, which used to be Civil Defense, is a small group of organizers While you read this sen- tence, six children will be born in developing countries. All will know hunger and disease. ., And - yet one may. become a teacher, a scientist, or a leader who could make a difference to the future. UNICEF, to help these underprivileged children in 114 countries, sells greeting cards. The cards are available in Pauline’s Hobby and Crafts, 7 p.m. - who recruit volunteers to assist in emergency situations. The volunteers are trained in search and rescue techniques, including first aid, wilderness survival and radio com- munication, They were recently involved in a search of the Mount Newton area where a man from Flowerwood school was missing. Police, a tracking dog and a helicopter were also involved. This was the first time he has been called as a_ volunteer member of the program, the teacher reported, although he has been a member for more than a year. Trustees voted to allow the teacher to attend emergency calls without losing pay. ‘“‘However, it may be there are emergencies so important we can accept classroom,”’ Tangye said. Trustee Walter UNICEF HELPS THE UNDERPRIVILEGED 2424 Beacon. Avenue, and at Safeway, 2345 Beacon Avenue. Every dollar raised in Canada, through government grants and = host support, becomes $14.00 by the time it reaches a child in need. UNICEF also received over $30 from this area in the orange boxes children carried with them this Hallowe’en, reports it GLENN HAWKINS | invites you to view his : WATERCOLORS & ACRYLICS | Preview Friday, Dec. 3rd, : 9 p.m. Exhibition continues to Saturday, Dec. 11th at TRUFFLES ART & CRAFT GALLERY 1-2417 Beacon Ave., Sidney, 656-6811 Gallery hours for show: Mon, - Sat, lO a.m, - 5 pom. Sunday, 2 p.m, -5 p.m. GRADE A-L & A-2 FREEZER Owed) JACK MACAULAY. a_ closed. country - HI KIDS Twill be passing through Saanich & Sidney on Saturday, Dee, 1, 1976. 1 Will beat Sanseha ball at b00 am, & at Deep Cove Sehoot at 2:00 pom. There are cartoons, songs, a play & e treats, ( Please bring a homemade decoration Oror the Christnas Tree, Gy (A See VOU SOON, of) y) Santa, a (\, Vana J Limited Amount of Fresh TURKEYS DON'T BE DISAPPOINTED, ORDER IN ADVANCE PORK SIDES GRAIN FED 60-70 AVE, LB. Sg 9 ‘ PRICES EFFECTIVE: THURS,, FRI, & SAT, ISLAND VIEW FREEZER LTD. 7005 E. SAANICH RD. 652-2411. story has been told, what can you do with him? Other than to tell it over and over again. It is impossible to demean the character of such a fine man. SOLUTION PRESENTED It appears that in order to salvage the creative lives of the peninsula’s current crop. of blossoming journalists (it may already be too late for the regular Review staff) it is urgently requested that a Portion of the — peninsula population begins behaving in a violently irrational manner. The size of the group itself is nota crucial factor. Neither is it necessary that the constituents of the group be dues paying members of common organizations, Indeed, a combination of zany groups and eccentric’ in- dividuals would be ideal but not. essential. For the time being, a party of totally in- dependent and assorted social deviates would provide adequate action to get things going. Surely there are already plenty of non-conformists at large in the community who, for one reason or another are too shy or timid to reveal themselves for fear of eing slammed in the stocks and pelted with last year’s jack-o- lanterns. Have no fear, you crackpots, the stocks have never been a form of punish- ment in this confederation and public flogging was discon- tinued over a year ago. So take solace in the notion that perhaps there are more like yourselves in this very municipality; model H-bomb builders, grave robbers, flea trainers, housewives who enjou nude — housekeeping, voyeurs who enjoy nude housekeepers, robots, SS men, female impersonators, man- gorilla hybrids, illegal atiens, obscene — telephone — callers, counterfeiters, pole — sitters, retired Kamakazi pilots: the list is endless. The Sidney writer is so limited in his flexibility. He has only one stvle: dull Not paradoxically, this is appealing to the majority of the Review readers, possibly because they would be alarmed by anything remotely exciting, for fear that the area and the paper which has become its voice, will exhibit signs of becoming too contemporary. There you have it readers. If you do in fact want news that is exciting, vibrant and intense, you will have to go out and instigate it yourselves. The newspapers don’t make it up. The last word is that if it is going to happen (social chaos in Sidney that is) then it had better happen soon, Apparently the rest of the world is sliding hellward in a brakeless handeart; journalism is seeking new lows in the revealing of scandalous “facts’’; and the peninsula is sll buzzing over Sebastian Cabot’s recent visit to the Brentwood village. Many reliable sources claim that the world (as we know it) is in its last days. Yet somehow or other I believe that the peninsula in all of its social tardiness will remain intact beyond the debris of Armegeddon. And that in the years to come The Review will report the presence of a frozen salmon obstructing — traffic MONEY SPENT IS MONEY INVESTED . .. When you buy insulation. Call 478-5323 & see how you can save up to 30% on your heating ASTRO INSULATION Specializing in blown insulation in ceilings bill. and walls, THE PLYWOOD PEOPLE Nemes along Beacon Avenue thusly: been there during the flash flood of "88 and frozen stiff when the glacier passed through.’* We've Had A Mayor Who Makes Headlines, — Now Let’s Get One Who Makes SENSE. vore SHERWOOD Inserted by the “Sidney Citizens for Sherwood’ Committee “must have Dicker-Martens makers of fine Canadian Acrylic Artist Products stranded presents an Exhibition of Acrylic Watercolours by noted artist G. D. Markovich December 4th, 1976 - 1-4 p.m. + Ee THE VILLAGE GALLERY 2459 Beacon Ave., Sidney, B.C. _with a copy of this ad we | (expires Dec. 5th, 1976) _ Store Ma Pre-Christmas ® : Special : 10% Discount on any iPre-Finished Panelling in stock, ,., egg INSULATION PLYWOOD — FIR # =—SORR-7-100 sq. ft. Rolls 7.49 | wGIS 8.07 Hh = R-7-150sq. ft. FF 11.00ctn. | 3/8GI1S 10.34 BH =«R-12-90sq. ft. FF 11.00cin. | 4 GIS 12.14 B = R-20-50 sq. ft. FF 11,00ctn. | 5/8 GIS 13.94 ; ¥% GIS 15.74 i Rot. Pop. TLR. M 2-0x6.8 13.14 22.25 26.40 _ SPRUCE N =. 2-6x6.8 15.21 24.61 29.20 ste B® = 3-0x6-8 17.46 27,23 32.22 oe 19 mM = 4-0x6-8 24.93 43.07 51.25 S78 GIS 12°19 fs 5-Ox6-8 «29,10 47.61 54.63 3 7 5 Rough 4.99 i 7 Ke ’ ¢ “ . . OONO-B 33.61 52.88 62.90 FV. 1d, Rough 6.99 ij —_ PRODUCTS — MISC. : 1x4 T&G Shorts 17 lin, Y dAxtlO Std. Shi, 13.99 1x6 T&G Shorts 125 lin, Ya 4x8 Std. Sht, 7.89 A 6x4 T&G R/L 25lin, | “ax8S.D, 9,99 M OIX6T&GR/L 38 lin. | 5/8 4x9 Saw, Tex 12.95 B Ax4 TRkG R/L 25lin, | 3/8 4x8 Ruff Tex 7.95 DB 'Ax6 T&G RAL. 38 ling | 5/8 4x8 Rull Lex 13.49 §/8x4 T&G R/L 25 lin, | 1’ 4x8S.D, 14,95 i All above stock is ! cedar, 7/16x4 Redwood T&G .25 lin, 1x6 Mah, T&G 1x6 Pine Panelling {for - Ld / j if ; K.D. clear 28 lin, 25 fin, Spectra-tone MISC. ‘Trogan Sawhorses ITEMS 9,95 Acrylic stain 6.95 vs U.S. 1 Rain - Stain 11 7/16" Aspenite WINDSOR, Saanich WINDSOR, Victoria 3032 Jutland 386-8222 al. 77 U.S. gal, 5.95 2120 Keating X Rd. 652-5632 (Open Sunday 10:00 - 5:00) CABINET PLYWOOD CHURLEY MORN NATURAL HAIRSTYLING 656-6811 By Appointment Only Page Il MY L.C. Birch 39.95 ¥% Ply-core-Birch 29,95 MY Sen LC, 36.95 ¥% Rosewood V.C, 69.95 ¥% Walnut L.C, 49.95 ¥% Pine V.C. 36.95 My Cedar 36.95 Ys Oak 39.95 Y% Teak 39.95 Y Teak 29,95 Y Walnut 29.95 ° ’ Sen, 25.95 VY Teak 17,49 “Walnut 21.95 ’% Pine 21.79 Yy Cedar’ 20.89 “4 Rosewood 24.95 VY Ash 15.95 Y Oak 22.95 MY Birch 17.95 1/8 Birch 10.95 1/8 Ash 10.95 1/8 Walnut 18.95 178 ‘Teak (12,95 “a? Primed Part-Wrd |-side 7.95 2-side 8,95 We also. stock M.D.F, Hardwood — veneered panels i Sen, Pine, Cedar, Teak, : Ww" & wy, G A A WINDSOR wy wy THE PLYWOOD PEOPLE :