Glen Taylor, author of I’m with you!

Exogamy =} ~Exogamy—what a word! You won't find it in every dictionary, at least not with the meaning it has in the context of Canada’s linguistic duality and cultural diversity. In this case, it’s defined as a union between two people with dif- ferent mother tongues and cultural back- grounds.

The adjective is exogamous. Some people prefer to use “mixed,” “linguistically mixed” or “culturally mixed,” while others insist that if means “just plain mixed up.” Regardless of the expression one chooses, the fact remains that a lot of children in Canada's francophone education system come from this type of family.

About your family...

Having established that you and your spouse form an exogamous couple, how would you describe your family identity? How would you express your family’s per- sonality—especially its linguistic compon- ent—to a stranger?

It's a question people don't generally dwell on. Rather, it’s a reality that evolves over time, and takes on a whole new ai- mension when children appear on the scene. It can also cause concern, even friction, between exogamous couples and members of their respective families. For instance, how many grandparents worry that their grandchildren won't be able to speak their language?

Yet with some basic, well-thought-out de- cisions and solidarity between the couple, building a harmonious family identity based on two or more languages and cul- tures can be very enriching.

Language

What's the most obvious difference be- tween your family and probably most of the others in your neighbourhood? The presence of at least two languages in your home: French and English. There may be even more languages floating around your house.

You and your spouse likely struck up a rela- tionship using a single language you both felt comfortable in. Statistics show that English is the most common language used by mixed couples outside Quebec]. One language is enough for many couples— until they decide to have children, that is. That's when they face a whole new set of questions, such as, “What language should we teach our child?”. Many couples want their offspring to learn both their mother tongues. In a minority situation, however, that's sometimes easier said than done.

If it's sometimes a challenge for two francophone parents fo maintain a bal- ance between French and English in their home, imagine what it’s like when only one parent speaks French!

Yet there's a simple way for linguistic- ally mixed couples fo help their children develop both sides of their family roots:

1 Mother Tongues vs. Home Language. (Statistics Canada, 1996 Census).

Section détachable

The exogamous families’ page | Parent hése

Exogamy - What a word!

Source: Glen Taylor, I’m with you! Exogamous families’ guide to the world of francophone education, 2002, pages 1-3.

show respect for each ofher's language and culture. When English is spoken virtu- ally everywhere outside the home, and especially when it’s the language used between the parents, this means one must encourage the use of French at home. In fact, it’s entirely appropriate fo emphasize French at home in order to compensate for the overwhelming influence of English elsewhere. By doing this, parents help their children achieve additive bilingualism, which involves mastering French and Eng- lish and developing a sense of belonging fo both cultures. What could be more fit- ting for children with two sets of roots?

This means francophone parents should speak and read French to their children from birth. At the same time, their non- francophone spouses can show that they value the use of French at home. They might even try speaking or reading in French themselves!

Above all, parents shouldn't worry about their youngsters’ ability fo communicate in English. By building a solid base in French, children will also develop solid English- language skills. In other words, they'll become fluently bilingual. Research has proven this, but it’s not the sort of news that makes the front pages of your local paper. That's why understanding and soli- darity between parents are crucial when extended families and friends start asking why the children speak so much French at home.